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For the New Year
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Literature Text
"And you hold me down
And you got me living in the past
Come on and pick me up
Somebody clear the wreckage from the blast"
This year I resolve to forget you
To leave behind your bright eyes
Your curly hair
And your infectious smile
In your brown eyes I once found pleasure
Now I only see pain
In your voice I once found comfort
Now I only find disarray
I resolve that this daytime nightmare will finally end
So I can finally dream again
Of blue skies
And fields of gold
And of someone else's eyes.
And you got me living in the past
Come on and pick me up
Somebody clear the wreckage from the blast"
This year I resolve to forget you
To leave behind your bright eyes
Your curly hair
And your infectious smile
In your brown eyes I once found pleasure
Now I only see pain
In your voice I once found comfort
Now I only find disarray
I resolve that this daytime nightmare will finally end
So I can finally dream again
Of blue skies
And fields of gold
And of someone else's eyes.
Song: The Resolution by Jack's Mannequin
Entry for OpenMicPoetry's contest
Entry for OpenMicPoetry's contest
© 2010 - 2024 ZombieAtHeart
Comments7
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first of all let me say that i like this. i like the idea of this.
second of all i'd like to tell you that i've written a lot of awful poems in my day and the reason i'd like to tell you that is because i've learned a little bit from each of them. i am establishing credibility (i don't have any).
this poem is concise and i like that. sometimes melodrama works and sometimes it doesn't. correct me if i'm wrong, but you strike me as a younger writer. i don't intend to critique your work so much as i intend to ramble about it until i run out of steam.
this poem is relatable, sure, and i think the goal of any poem is to get some sort of reaction out of the reader, though i can't help but wonder: would this poem resonate with a 45 year old recently-divorced man in the same way it would resonate with a teenager? i'm not saying i know the answer, and i'm not saying the answer is good or bad. just putting it out there.
second of all i'd like to tell you that i've written a lot of awful poems in my day and the reason i'd like to tell you that is because i've learned a little bit from each of them. i am establishing credibility (i don't have any).
this poem is concise and i like that. sometimes melodrama works and sometimes it doesn't. correct me if i'm wrong, but you strike me as a younger writer. i don't intend to critique your work so much as i intend to ramble about it until i run out of steam.
this poem is relatable, sure, and i think the goal of any poem is to get some sort of reaction out of the reader, though i can't help but wonder: would this poem resonate with a 45 year old recently-divorced man in the same way it would resonate with a teenager? i'm not saying i know the answer, and i'm not saying the answer is good or bad. just putting it out there.